Sheep Placenta Killed my Beard

I woke up in the night wanting an emergency crap, and realised that my rest-bite yesterday was only temporary… and enough to make me feel poo (!) all day and my stomach tender. (I was also thankful I'd stolen some loo roll from the hotel to take to the office after the other day, in case of emergencies)

I go to the chemists to get some poo pills: the first one I went into there were a load of assistants in the corner, all giggling at something, and I was a bit reluctant to go up and ask for poo medicine, as knowing my luck, I doubt they would understand me and I’d have to do an improvisation of diarrhoea. Instead, I asked another lady in the shop, who knew what I wanted but then shouted over to the giggling ones where to find them! To prolong the agony, one of the girls tried to explain that the pharmacist was out to dinner and I could "GET MY DIARRHOEA TABLETS FROM THE CHEMIST DOWNSTAIRS", loudly, across the shop.

On my quick exit way out I noticed some sheep’s placenta products and ran faster. I googled "sheep placenta" later and found this:

Mr Fernandez and his dead beard

Testimonial By Mr. Fernandez

Here you have a picture of mine at 57 after a few month taking your product - compare me with Bill Clinton who was born in the same year!  I have some gray hair in my beard that is died in the picture, but they are disappearing too."

Interesting – his beard ‘died’ after using the product...

Actually I really wasn’t feeling well and bought some comfort food (crisps) from the shop and ordered room service with a bottle of wine. Probably not the best combination of food when you have an upset stomach, but who cares!